Of ice cream and assholes
Who doesn’t love ice cream? Well, besides vegans, the lactose intolerant and cranky people. Nobody, that’s who. So why is it, so many of the people at Worcesters annual ice cream festival on the common Saturday, were not easily recognizable as people at all? This is the sort of event business should shut down for, schools should close for (if we were to pretend that it wasn’t summer and school was in session on saturday, that is) and free shuttles should be moving bodies from every corner of the earth, for. It’s fucking ice cream folks! Instead, a large part of the crowd seemed to be made up of exactly who you would expect to find relaxing the common on any given saturday, folks who woke up shit faced and cats who you might be concerned about contracting hepatitis from. Now, that’s not to say the only people there were derelicts; plenty of families, kids, younger types and general ice cream fans were out in force, but if there was not a douche-bag convention being held in Worcester this weekend color me shocked. How does this happen?
Well let me tell you how this happens. Worcester is still marketing itself like a beat up, run down town. There was a great editorial in WoMag a few weeks back, the first great editorial WoMag has run in some time, which basically made the point that we should hold off pushing our wares on the outside world while we’re still heavily in ‘transition’; but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be selling the shit out of ourselves, to ourselves. The only reason I knew this event was going down at all was because someone on local message board made mention of it on Friday; this person just happens to work downtown so it was pretty hard for her not to notice. As for the rest of us, unless you’re part of whatever bizarre, provincial network exists to clue folks in to these things, you’re shit out of luck. Now, we do have an official marketing department in Worcester, they just don’t seem to have a clue as to how to get word out to the folks who actually want to partake in the cities offerings. One example, pick a city you like. Any city will do, just make it the kind of place where you go because stuff is likely to be happening. Now go to their website, chances are good without much effort you’ll be presented with a bunch of local goings on; in Worcester you get a handful of banged up slogans and an update on street sweeping. Of course you’re only two clicks away from buying tickets to our arena football team, the SURGE, which shares the unfortunate name of the single most unpopular military build-up in American history. Did someone say something about marketing? Right.
I’m sure someone is out there yelling at their monitor about now telling me how wrong I am, that it’s my responsibility to know what’s up, not the cities job to inform me; well try this hat on for size. There is one and only one way to judge the success of a supposedly well marketed and attended public event in Worcester, especially during a particularly tough election year, and that’s by the number of elected officials and their wanna-be successors in the crowd. In the two hours I spent on the common today, not a single candidate for local office was openly making the rounds. These are people who can turn a funeral into successful face time and this was an event purportedly directed towards families who are the likeliest of targets in a budget crunch year. If you can’t make enough noise while promoting your event to ensure a Gary Rosen comb in every hand in attendance, you failed. Hard.
Worcester in general and Children’s Friend in particular, can fuck up Ice Cream. A previously unknown phenomenon. Pete, maybe next year WhizSpark can give them a hand?
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4 Responses to “Of ice cream and assholes”
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Sent this out this morning:
Hello Deborah,
My name is Gabe Rollins. I love ice cream.
Or should I say it like this?
My name is Gabe Rollins. I have lived in Worcester for ten years.
Or should I say it like this?
My name is Gabe Rollins. I love ice cream, have lived in Worcester for ten years and have never been to your festival once because every year I hear about this festival after it has happened.
How is that?
How is it that I drive right down McGrath Blvd, Worcester Center Blvd, and Shrewsbury St, 10 plus times a week, read Worcester Magazine weekly and frequent 2 (Volcanoboy.com and Wormtownnightlife.com) heavy traffic local message boards and still did not hear about this until the evening of Friday the 13th?
Don’t get me wrong I think that what you are doing is great and it is a good thing for your charity and the city. I think it is such a good thing that I can’t believe how poorly planned it is. I have a couple suggestions. Instead of putting a banner on City Hall how about a banner across Main Street? How about doing a little message board marketing?
I will be honest about my selfishness however. Really I am just a little peaved because it seems like no one in this city knows how to publicize anything and my quality of life suffers for it. On a regular basis I hear about way more intresting things happening 45 minutes to an hour away from Worcester then I do happening in my own city. Of course there is a larger volume of things happening in other places but the point is that I don’t even live in these places and I hear about the events and goings on there.
All I know is this. I love me some ice cream and I would of ate the hell out of some ice cream for your charity and I am not alone. Do a better job getting the word out next year. You won’t be dissapointed. Here is a local blogger, homeowner and parent who feels the same way I do, and he actually went to the thing. http://www.radioball.net
Sincerely,
Gabriel Rollins
I’ll take any help anyone wants to give me on promoting my event this weekend…
http://www.myspace.com/mothersfoundation
Now, I want you to know there are very few things I miss, so there is usually a good reason why. I just started a new job, and had to attend a conference in DC and did not get back until late Sunday. Otherwise….I would definately be there. Thanks for missing us!
“Instead, a large part of the crowd seemed to be made up …cats who you might be concerned about contracting hepatitis from. ”
I think this had a lot to do with Pinecroft giving out free samples of it’s latest flavor, hepatitis swirl, drizzled with warm, gooey mathadone.