Sounds ok to me
I feel like I’m just sydicating BoingBoing for the last two days. But Mark Frauenfelder just posted this and it’s too delicious to ignore.
This libertarian is going to stay nice and warm in the good ‘ol U.S.A.B!
MY MODEST PROPOSAL: THE U.S.A.R.
By C. B. ShapiroI feel bad for the Red States.
Yes, they won the White House, Congress, the Supreme Court and most of the state houses. But they still can’t have the country they really want because the last few Blue States won’t roll over. So I am making a simple proposal:
Secession. Divorce. Splitsville.
Personally, I think we made a huge mistake not letting them go when we had the chance back in 1862. Well, no time like the present to correct an old mistake.
Then, they would finally be free to have the kind of society they’ve always wanted; church and state can be fused so they build the kind of theocracy they’ve dreamt of, with Jesus at the helm. Then the new USAR (United States of America Red) can ban books, repeal civil rights, persecute gays and have all the wars they like. They want prayer in schools? More power to them. They can ban abortion and post the Ten Commandments in every federal building in their country. Bring back slavery, if they want. We’ll be free to live with our like-minded countrymen who believe in science, modernism, tolerance, religion as a personal choice, and truly want limited government intrusion in our personal lives. Why should each side be driven mad by the other any more, decade after decade?
Call the Culture War a tie and everyone go home.
Of course, we in the U.S.A.B. get the Gross Domestic Product, businesses and universities of California, New York, Massachussetts — basically the whole Northeast and Northwest (plus Illinois and Michigan if they want to come along). They get Wal-Mart and Duke and most of the Nascar tracks. But they can feel free to import movies, TV shows, financial services, and defense technology. We’ll import country music, bibles and Confederate flags.
The two countries will by necessity have open immigration policy: anyone who feels they are living in the wrong country can just move across the border, no questions asked.
Ultimately, why should I have to convince my fellow countrymen that Darwin may have had a point and that the word “liberal” is not equivalent to “godless communist?” And why should they be forced to live in a country with morally corrupt non-believers? I’ll stay in the messy, free-thinking U.S.A.B. And to the U.S.A.R. I say…
God bless you all, and see you at the U.N.
A post election guide to expatriating
Harpers is re-running this piece on skipping town now that the election is done. Some funny stuff.
A less fortunate attempt was made in 1972, when Michael Oliver, a Nevada businessman, built an island on a reef 260 miles southwest of Tonga. Hiring a dredger, he piled up sand and mud until he had enough landmass to declare independence for his “Republic of Minerva.” Unfortunately, the Republic of Minerva was soon invaded by a Tongan force, whose number is said to have included a work detail of prisoners, a brass band, and Tonga’s 350-pound king himself. The reef was later officially annexed by the kingdom.
link
in related news, do we know if Larry has taken flight yet?
Well it look’s like Diebold got it’s wish
From an August 7th CBS news story.
A Diebold plot to rig the elections? Where did that idea come from? The rumors began with this letter from Diebold’s CEO, Wally Odell, who was moonlighting as a Republican fundraiser. In his invitation to a benefit for Bush last August, he wrote, “I am committed to helping Ohio deliver its electoral votes to the president.”
BoingBoing election follow up
Xeni over at boingboing has put together a collection of excellent post election commentary.
Nobody takes blogs seriously
Interesting article from Reuters yesterday, blaming a mid day stock slide on a potential Kerry win. The souce being cited for the projection? blog chatter.
Best hotels for Wi-Fi
Hotel Chatter is running a breakdown of what they consider to be the best hotels for Wi-Fi. I don’t plan travel around Wi-Fi since you can usually find an AP somewhere without to much trouble, but this guide gives a good idea of what you can expect if you do end up staying at one.
Introducing the Quinny Buzz
I have to admit that 7 months ago the stroller world was the last place I would have looked for interesting, innovative design. But now that my girlfriend and I are in the home stretch in this here reproduction biz, I find myself in awe of some of the incredible work that is coming out of the buggy community. This offering from the Netherlands based company Quinny has much in common with all the other great Euro strollers that toss out standard American over styling in favor of compact, sleek designs. Personally this is exactly how I want to be hauling the kid. When I saw the new stroller a cousin of mine received recently, with no less than THREE CUP HOLDERS, I couldn’t help but laugh out loud. My car doesn’t have three cup holders. I don’t want to be taking up a lane of the roadway with a stroller, just to take the kid for a walk. We settled on a Maclaren Techno XT which it seems will suit our needs, but if availability was to change, I think this might be even better.
link (via daddy types)
A vote for nothing
Well I don’t know if the best man won, but I do know it wasn’t the best man who lost.
Either way, congratulations America! We got what we voted for and now we have some work to do.
How’d your vote go?
kottke.org wants to know how your vote went today.
‘The liberal elite hasn’t got a clue’
While you prepare to suit up and head into battle for either the right or the left, Tom Wolfe continues to dance with class straight down the middle. Sort of…
“Indeed, I was at a similar dinner, listening to the same conversation, and said: ‘If all else fails, you can vote for Bush.’ People looked at me as if I had just said: ‘Oh, I forgot to tell you, I am a child molester.’ I would vote for Bush if for no other reason than to be at the airport waving off all the people who say they are going to London if he wins again. Someone has got to stay behind.”
